Encouragement to Help Get Started
Well, I had an interesting response to my big “whoops” last week. For those of you who are new to this list and don’t know what the whoops was I will take a quick moment to explain.
I am using a new online service to manage my newsletter list. It handles things such as verifying emails as well as sending out newsletters. Now I was trying to send out a welcome message to a new member – unfortunately the service and I disagreed about how that should be done. In the end I managed to send out a welcome message to everyone on my list (some of whom have been members for almost a year).
Whoops…..
Anyway, people took it easy on me and were understanding when I explained what happened. I’m not surprised. The people I have been meeting since starting my newsletter have been terrific.
One such person is Lee. Lee contacted me right after the whoops with this...
> Hi David,
>
> Not to worry!
>
> (snip)
>
> Interesting way to get me to reply to you though.
>
> FYI.. I'm thinking of joining a Toastmasters group, but, yes.. I
> suffer from that (ridiculous?) nervousness re talking "with nothing
> much to say" in front of people I don't know. Although I'm ok if I'm
> facing people I know, and if I have something I need to say to them.
>
> I wonder how to overcome the idea that I'm blowing smoke, my own
> trumpet, boring strangers - or worse, offending them - and only
> rummaging around for amusing (really??) ok, embarrassing anecdotes
> simply for the purpose of saying I did it.
>
> Somehow I think that's where my sense of insecurity comes from. I find
> myself thinking about that more than I do worrying in general about
> standing in front of people.
>
> There you have it! You've wheedled out an overview from me simply by a
> non-error in software manipulation!
>
> Man! You're good LOL!!
>
> Lee
>
Wow, did I just get complimented or mocked?... I'm pretty sure I know which it was. Oh well, a public speaker should be able to take it (In fact I do enjoy a good banter).
Here is my response to Lee.
> Hi Lee,
>
> I appreciate the compliment ("Man your good") - but it really was an
> accident
>
> Why not just go to a Toastmasters meeting and see if it's for you?
> You may be pleasantly surprised.
>
> I just finished teaching a public speaking course for the City of
> Cambridge. I had one lady in the class who was similar to you. She
> kept asking for something to talk about - she couldn't think of
> anything because her life was “boring.” What she didn’t realize was
> that she was fascinating. She had all sorts of unique experiences
> that others were interested in. Even more surprising was that she
> enjoyed telling others about them – but only in conversation. As
> soon as she thought about giving a speech her mind would go
> blank. It wasn’t until we pointed out all the experiences that she
> had talked about that she start realizing how much material she
> had to work with.
>
> I'm sure you are the same. We all have unique experiences. If we
> present them in an interesting manner it won't be just "blowing
> smoke". Your audience will really enjoy it.
>
> How do you get to the point of being able to take an experience and make
> it interesting to others? Well I'm trying to give you information
> about that with my newsletter (through sections on leadership,
> relevance, captivating the audience, etc). Along with the
> information you will benefit with practice and a TM club is
> a great place to start doing that.
>
> Thanks,
>
> David.
Here is what Lee had to say in return.
> Hi David,
>
> Thanks for the encouragement, and the good ideas. You're right about
> the similarity between me and the lady in the City of Cambridge class.
> Even though I often put it down to shyness - which I think has a lot
> to do with it - I'm pretty sure it's really a matter of feeling able
> to create (what I think is) an interesting conversation between myself
> and the audience.
>
> I've read through the information at your site, and found it extremely
> useful! Thank you for that too!!
>
> Thanks for your reply. I'm going to a Toastmasters meeting tonight to
> test the water. We'll see how it goes.
>
> Lee
Finally, Lee wrote me a couple of days ago. Here are her comments.
> Hi David,
>
> Just to let you know I went to my second Toastmasters meeting on Tuesday.
> They made me timer this time so I was able to feel part of things easily when
> it was my turn to speak.
>
> All-in-all a pleasant experience.
>
> Thank you so much for your input. Your encouragement really helped a lot!
>
> Lee
Now why did I drag you through all this correspondence – to make a few points.
First:
I don’t bite. No really…. I don’t Lee admitted that she wouldn’t have corresponded with me if I had not created the Whoops in the first place. Well for everyone else here who has a question, an insight or a contribution please don’t hold back. Send it to me. I will do my best to help you out and answer.
Second:
Toastmasters don’t bite either. No really… they don’t. A local Toastmasters club can provide you with a lot of support and help you achieve your goal of not only overcoming your fear but mastering the art of public speaking.
Third: - and probably the most important…
You are interesting. Yes, I’m talking directly to you the person who is reading this right now – not anyone else who may receive this newsletter. You have experiences, feelings, emotions, areas of knowledge, etc that are unique to you – and people would love to have you share those areas with them. By thinking about how your audience would be interested in them you can create and deliver a captivating speech.
Finally:
Lee thanks for communicating with me and allowing me to share your experiences with everyone. I’m sure that your courage in communicating with me in the first place, visiting the local club and allowing me to share your story will help others who read this newsletter take action to overcome their very real fears.
David.
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Encouragement to Help Get Started