Is High Self-Esteem Really an Advantage

Have you ever considered whether a fear of public speaking is related to our self-esteem?  


I have.

If I am incompetent at something and I’m not aware of it then I am an unconscious incompetent. In short, I don’t know what I don’t know.  If I find out that I am incompetent then I become a conscious incompetent. That is, I am now aware of what I don’t know.  If I learn the skills that I need to know in order to become competent then I will be a conscious competent. I now know what I know.  And finally, if I use those skills so much that they become natural to me that I don’t even think about them I become an unconscious competent. I have come to the point of not knowing what I know.

We sometimes use the expressions of 1^st nature to describe the unconscious competent and 2^nd nature to describe the conscious competent. 3^rd and 4^th natural also exist (and are what you would expect) however the expressions are rarely used.

So the individual who can get up in front of an audience without thinking about is an unconscious competent. S/he has a high self-esteem and it feels very natural to “just do it.”

 

 I would argue however that the individual who is anywhere between the stages of conscious incompetent and conscious competent are at an advantage. Why - Because they are able to adapt to situations.

The unconscious competent is fine as long as what s/he is doing keeps working. S/he doesn’t know why S/he’s doing it – it just feels right and it works. But if it stops working S/he will have to stop “doing what just feels right” and start thinking about what s/he is doing. That will feel uncomfortable – so much so that some people will be unable to do it.

Let me give you a simple illustration.

In North America, where I live, we drive on the right hand side of the road. I have personally been doing this for 23+ years. As a result I’m pretty good at it – so good in fact that most of the time I’m not consciously thinking about it (1^st Nature).

Compare that to a 16 year old who is the process of learning how to drive. S/he is somewhere between unconscious incompetent and conscious competent. S/he has to consciously think about everything that is happening around her/him and everything that s/he does in response to it.

Now what would happen if both us were relocated to a country where they drive on the left side of the road. 

For me, I would constantly have to override my unconscious desire to revert to right side driving. I would also be struggling with the positions of the turn indicator, windshield washer controls and gear shift.

Compare that to the 16 year old. Although there may be a change, it’s only in the conscious realm – they simply have to change the conscious rules that they have been working under. Fortunately for the 16 year old, changing the conscious thought process is much easier than the subconscious process.

Now if we apply that to public speaking we can see why someone who is naturally confident in front of an audience might be at a disadvantage. If they have never had to think about what they are doing it’s going to be very uncomfortable to do so if they have difficulty reaching their audience.

The next time you see someone who is a natural at anything (including public speaking) take heart in the fact that the effort that you are putting in now will give you an advantage of being able to adapt and still be effective in the future.

I’m going to be sharing some additional thoughts about self-esteem in some upcoming newsletters.

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Copyright © 2007 David Mudie All Rights Reserved

 

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